Let Go of the Lid Already

 It's hard to believe that it's now been almost 13 months since we said goodbye to our wonderful, unique, but Ohsotiny home.  I loved its history and the memories we made but it was time to move on to bigger spaces! 

The process of selling our home and buying a new(er) one proved to be an experiment in "hurry up and wait."  I'm not the best waiter.  I mean, I've never been a waiter or a waitress and I'm sure I wouldn't be good at that either, but that's not what I'm talking about.  We signed on approximately a bajillion dotted lines, and prayed.  I prayed and prayed and prayed some more, but instead of just exercising my faith, I did whatever I could in my own power to move things forward. (Not a good idea, FYI).

I got more and more frustrated at the lack of speed in the whole process, until one day I had the most vivid picture in my mind.  When one of my kids can't open a jar, they twist the lid and grunt and after a few tries, they bring it to me.  They ask me to help, but they still hold on to the lid.  I try to open it for them, but their little fingers are still there, sometimes twisting in the wrong direction completely.  To open their "prize", I have to pry their hands loose first.  Only when their hands are out of the way can I take over and do what they are too weak to do.

That image made me realize exactly what I was doing.  Not only were my own efforts not helping, but they were probably delaying things!  All I really needed to do was step back and take my fingers off the lid.  When my weak and frail efforts were removed, I was finally allowing God to lead us through that transition in His timing and His will.  It's a lot easier to see that in retrospect.  When I'm grappling with something that I really can't change....it's time to let go and hand over what I'm trying to open-to the only One who knows what is best for me.

Mama Duck

 I used to see "those moms" with lots of kids and think I would never be one of "those moms".  They have all the patience and can even do their kids' hair and get them in matching outfits!  Those moms can make meals and crafts and their children *never* fight.

So now for the next 14 days, I'm toting six children around.  I'm pretty sure that qualifies as a lot of kids, no matter who you are.  They don't match, I kind of do their hair, and I have just enough patience to make it to bedtime and start over the next day.  Who would've thought?  Caffeine, chocolate, and the prayers of good friends have made what seemed ridiculous to me, into a reality. 

Of course, this parenting six children thing is for a very short amount of time.  Pretty sure I really couldn't do it all. the. time.

For the past five days, we've been in transition.  Going from having all independent children, who can buckle their own seat belts and play without constant supervision, back to diapers, sippy cups, and "put that down it's glue not chapstick!" has been a shift, to put it mildly.  There is a reason (at least one!) that babies don't arrive in this world as two-year-olds.

This morning I opened a new gallon of milk and threw the lid right in the trash can.  I barely have enough mental focus to write a shopping list, and I'd really rather not talk about what my house looks like.  I keep coming back to the "hit by a truck" analogy.  But it's not like getting hit and run over...it's more like standing still, and then getting hit and stuck on the grill of the truck and flying down the highway.  It's not that the work is harder, it's just so much more constant.

But the Safe Families journey is one that I'm sure we're supposed to be on.  I didn't know it would be so rewarding along with being so tough.  I think the hardest part will be letting our host kids go when it is time to say goodbye to them.

If you want to know more about the mission of Safe Families, check out www.safe-families.org.